The latest trend on social media is to post videos in jest about "being demure or very mindful". This most recent fad was started by TikTok contributor Jools Lebron from Chicago who posted a video "How to be demure at work" which went viral. Now there are several videos showing how people are being "demure, mindful" in their daily activities.
Honestly, I had never heard of the word "demure" until this came out. Demure means to be "modest, reserved or serious". In addition to demure, the adjective "very mindful" has also been added to the description.
If you ask most people, I think they would describe my personality as being very demure and very mindful. I'm not very extroverted until you get to know me. I tend to be slow in opening up to people until I'm sure I can trust you.
So how did I become "very demure" and "very mindful"?
I grew up as a preacher's kid and we moved around a lot. That meant that every year or so I would have to adjust to a new church, new school and new routines. I tended to observe people to first before opening up. I was always afraid of people making fun of me - and some would. Most would comment on me being so quiet and not saying much. Yeah, they didn't realize I was watching them.
Even as an adult, I would be very reserved at first especially in an office environment. I remember a co-worker making a comment once how I seemed so serious while working in a stressful situation in the courtroom but then I told him that I may have looked that way on the outside, but I was freaking out on the inside.
Another time I was walking down the hallway at work, and someone asked why I was mad. Apparently, my facial expression wasn't very cheerful. I told them that I wasn't mad but was thinking (mindful) about what I was doing. Even now I am asked what I am mad about because my facial expression doesn't always convey what is going on in my mind. I'm usually not mad about anything, it's just my face.
I will admit that many times it may be confusing to know if I'm "very demure, very mindful" by my facial expressions. Let me tell you - there's a lot going on in my head at times however, when I feel that things are chaotic, I always find a place to take a timeout and regroup. For me, I talk to God about it. Most of the time I just sit in silence. God doesn't always need us to talk, many times He understands the language of our silence. Making time to sit in silence and meditate is often a challenge for us to do because we feel like we must being doing something but I have found that this time is vital to our mental and spiritual health.
So how can we be more demure? It starts with being more mindful or our words and actions and projecting a sense of calm and composure in all situations. It's about listening more than speaking and when we speak, speak kindly to others. Don't you agree that the world needs more people who are demure? There are way too many people who "speak their minds" these days but we really need to remember that are words and actions can either hurt or help others. In a world where people are quick to anger, we need to project a sense of calm and composure.
There are several passages in the New Testament which talk about "having the mind of Christ" which means to have our actions and words filtered through what would Christ do in each situation. Having "the mind of Christ" is ultimately the best way to being "very demure, very mindful" in everything we do.
